Best Sentence of the Day

All of a sudden a lot of the jokes on the Simpsons started to make more sense.

beanut putter and jelly

So I believe that Egypt is a ripe proving ground for my latest audio-linguistic theory:

As some of you may know, Egyptians, especially of a lower socio-economic status, have dificulty distinguishing between the voiced and unvoiced bilabial plosive (/p/ & /b/) usually this results in many English /p/ words sounding like /kombooter/ (for computer) or /bleez/ for please.

Well, here's the interesting part (to me, at least): Since I've gotten to Egypt, I've noticed that, when I type, I occassionally transpose these two letters! They are no where near each other on the keyboard, and, although they do mildly resemble each other, it is not like the f and p, or the i and l. So where does this mistake come from?

Some proffessional linguists assure me that there is no known linguistic theory to account for this. They were perfectly willing to offer up some non-linguistic explanations (i.e. that I'm bonkers, or just plain wrong).

So here is my challenge: somebody come up with a cogent theory to explain this phenomenon, and I'll test it here in Egypt.

Any takers?

On the brighter side...

Ramadan is increasing the time I have to spend with Mk. Twice a wekk we get to school about a half hour before the nursery opens its doors. We spend the time playing on the playground and I find it delightful.

She is also getting used to the place, yesterday afternoon, when I went to pick her up, she didn't want to leave, she was having so much fun there. This morning was the first time she didn't fuss when I dropped her off she walked right in, sat down and started flipping through a book. Maybe it was the pink silk Hello Kitty Kimono she was wearing. (Thanks, Terry)

Also, last night she slept in her own bed the entire night. Usually she wakes up to nurse. I only know this because she's always in our bed when we wake up in the morning, but today, I went and got her out of her own crib in the morning.

In other Mk news: Her vocabulary has increased dramatically recently. In addition to Bye bye, she now says hello. She also says dog (or maybe duck) which is the word for every animate creature except humans. She's also got command of shoes and juice which, because of their phonetic similarity, have caused a few comic situations.

Her Arabic also seems to be expanding at a similar, if not greater pace. Yesterday, when it was time to go down to the garden, she pointed at the floor and said, quite firmly, taht (down). We also suspect that she is saying 'oh, as a version of qqoh (yucky).

I love watching her grow.

Ramadan: Kareem or Bidan*?

So, I'm into day four of my fifth Ramadan. I've discovered that my dislike of the month is in inverse proportion to the ammount of guilt I feel for not fasting. As a non-muslim, I know this is preposterous, but never-the-less, when your surrounded by 50 million fasting people, you tend to wonder if maybe you should avoid the luncheon meat, ya know?

The last five years, (with one ramadan off in DC) my ramadans have been super stressfull. The first three I actually tried to fast. The second year (my first here in Egypt) I actually made it until the third week before giving up. Last year, I just resolved not to eat in public, hiding behind closed doors or furtively gobbling a small sandwich in my cubbyhole when no one was around. Anytime I was invited to an Iftar (Arabic for breakfast, served at sunset during Ramadan), I did fast for that day.

This year, I am flaunting my food. I eat when I want, what I want. I order sandwiches and lemonade delivered to my desk (by fasting Muslims), and, when I do go to an Iftar, it'll be my third meal of the day.

Guess which year I've been least stressed out about Ramadan?

Now, in the interest of fairness, I've decided to make a list of plusses and minuses for the non-muslim living through Ramadan. Let's start with the plusses:

Ramadan Kareem
No smoking during the day
Shorter lines in the faculty lunch room
no traffic between 4 and 6 pm (everyone is already home)
greater generosity and less hunger (everyone eats well in Ramadan, regardless of income)
Workday ends an hour earlier

OK, now the minuses:

Ramadan Bidan
Classes are only 40 minutes long (how can I do anything in 40 minutes? Attendance takes 40 minutes)
Two days a week, classes start 40 minutes earlier (because we want to make sure they have enough time for lunch break, fer pete's sake!)
L'Aroma, the nearest Cafe is closed for the Month
Tahrir Kushri, my comfort food, is also closed for the month
The sandwhiches I get delivered, come without any extras (tomatoes, condiments etc.)
My students are exausted during the day (they've been out celebrating all night)
They don't have time for any homework (their social obligations really are extreme)
They have a major test the week after Ramadan ends.


So, in this analysis, I'd have to say, in total, Ramadan Bidan!


*kareem translates as "sweet" or "nice" bidan roughly means "sucks balls"

Clinton the Badass?

I loved watching this interview (Parts 1, 2, and 3). Truth is, I'd tune in to Bubba just about anytime. The guy sure can talk. He seemed to prevaricate a little bit, especially when he back pedaled on whether the 9-11 report was the definitive source, or if it was Richard Clarke (isn't he the new year's eve guy). On the whole though, I thought he ripped Wallace a new one, and it was fun to watch. His basic point, I think, is totally spot on. Clinton was actively trying to catch this guy (when the oppostion was worried about who creamed on who's jeans) and then they got into office and didn't do squat. Yet the question is always "why didn't Clinton do more?" They never ask the other guys that, do they?

Tribute...and blanket attribution

Before I get too much further in this blog, I need to explain that my a lot the political/cultural stuff I post is cherry picked off of The Daily Dish. I'm not trying to copy Andrew Sullivan's excellent work, its just that I find much of the things I'm concerned about concern him as well. He is an excellent source of information. If you find the topics I write about to be important, then I strongly suggest that you check his blog out on a daily basis. I do. Even though I use his links, and write on the same topics, I do add my own personal take on issues. I just wanted to give fair warning. I don't really scan hundreds of webpages looking for good sources and info (although if he doesn't have what I'm looking for, I do some independent research). But I do have a day job and Sullivan is a great shortcut into most of the issues which really matter.

The Pope & Islam

There is an interesting interview of Kevin Madigan, SJ, president of the Institute for the Study of Religions and Cultures at the Pontifical Gregorian University in Rome that offers some insight into the latest furor. I'd recommend reading the original speech first, because, even though he get's a lot right, Madigan's take is off the mark in a few instances.

First, he says :

the Byzantine emperor’s position was relevant to the Holy Father’s larger theme: the rationality of God and the irrationality of violence. It is significant that the emperor was Greek because the pope wanted to underline the confluence of Greek philosophy and biblical faith.

But then he adds his own commentary:

It seems to me essential not to lock Muslims into one particular reading of their texts and traditions. It is nonsensical to say to someone who claims that Islam is a peaceful religion that he may not believe such a thing because the Qur’an says such-and-such. She should be encouraged to believe that Islam is peaceful and held to observe that.

I think the Pope wasn't trying to "Lock Muslims into one particular reading"; rather, he was commenting on the actions of people. I mean, there is violence and Islamic practice is forced upon people. If you don't think so, look at the Afghani who was almost sentenced to death from converting to Christianity.

By the end, Madegan has devolved into pure PC balderdash where the violence of the Islamic world is because of their poverty. That meme has been clearly refuted, IMHO, by the high numbers of terrorists which are actually fairly well educated, and come from staunchly middle class backgrounds. I mean, my students, certainly not poverty stricken by any sense of the imagination, often talk about violence as a means to justify religious differences. Madegan, however, does give throw the Pope this bone:

None of this is to say that it is all the fault of non-Muslims.

Well, gee, thanks. You mean this extremely out-of-proportion response to a legitimate critique is not my fault? Thanks for the support. Not.

A Political Victory?

A thorough (albeit depressing) review of the new law on interrogations:

"both sides appear to believe that the agreement permits the CIA to continue to use sleep deprivation, cold rooms, and other such techniques," even though such techniques do, in fact, constitue a breach of our Geneva obligations."

The NYT doesn't agree, but has other critiques:

It would impose new legal standards that it forbids the courts to enforce. It would guarantee terrorist masterminds charged with war crimes an array of procedural protections. But it would bar hundreds of minor figures and people who say they are innocent bystanders from access to the courts to challenge their potentially lifelong detentions.

I've read the proposed bill, and I'd agree with both source's evaluations. Sigh, a grim day for human rights.

Ding Dong, OSB is Dead?

Rather Anti-Climatic, if true, but still good news.

SPF Crank Factor: 49

Since I started taking the girl to the AUC nursery, putting her to sleep at night has been a dream. Somehow, their insistence that she take a two-hour nap every afternoon has resigned her to the fact that life includes sleeping, and that the best way to deal with it is simply to flop down and go to sleep.

But I can't get J to buy into the system. Every weekend, she wants to skip nap time. Today, we spent the afternoon at Mirage City, its a huge plaza of pools, playgrounds, wave machines and a small strip of sand known as "the beach". Way too much stimulation for a little girl to sleep. So, 'round about three, when the girl's crankiness factor is way up at the top of the scale, we drove home, but instead of a quite restful afternoon in the house, we attended a garden party in honor of the eight year old girl downstairs. It was a cool party and we are all very fond of the birthday girl, but our little munchkin had definitely had enough.

Getting her to go to bed was, not surprisingly, much tougher than it has been all week. Even though she was super tired, she was also super irritable (as were the two of use) and so she cried for a long time before settling down. Once she had quited down, I tried to sneak out, which the girl caght and started wailing again.

At this point, I gave up. J hung in there, singing, and trying to calm her while I went in for a small dose of brain numbing (internet and tv).

An hour later, the girl is fast asleep in her play pen (she's outgrown the crib because she can climb out of it too easily), but J is no where to be found. Not in our bed, not in the office, and she didn't come into the living room where I was. Well, I found her: She's curled up asleep in the munchkin's crib. Munchkin's got a room mate, I guess.

Bush Backs down?

Some resolution? (password required)

Common Article 3 guarantees humane treatment to combatants seized during wartime. The two sides agree that the article’s language prohibiting “outrages upon human dignity” is too vague and leaves military and C.I.A. personnel uncertain about what techniques they may use in interrogating detainees.

The White House has argued that without more “clarity,” it will have no choice but to shut down a C.I.A. program for interrogating top terrorism suspects. But Mr. Warner, Mr. McCain and Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina have argued against any changes in the language interpreting the article, saying such a change would invite other countries to reinterpret the Geneva Conventions as they saw fit, which in turn could endanger captured American troops.

The senators propose to provide clearer guidelines for interrogators by amending the War Crimes Act to enumerate several “grave breaches” that constitute violations of Common Article 3.

Several issues appeared to remain in flux, among them whether the two sides could agree on language protecting C.I.A. officers from legal action for past interrogations and for any conducted in the future. Beyond the issue of interrogations, the two sides have also been at odds over the rights that should be granted to terrorism suspects during trials, in particular whether they should be able to see all evidence, including classified material, that a jury might use to convict them.

I'm still a little fuzzy on the whole thing. But I think that specifying which techniques would be allowed and which prohibited (as the AFC wants to do) is a good idea (and addresses the lack of clarity issue). However, I think caution should be exercised in granting amnesty to earlier interrogations, it sounds more like a cya move by Bush and Rumsfield for allowing extreme coercive techniques. I'd say, give the field agents amnesty, but those who set the policy should take responsibility for their actions.

I'm glad to see that Bush backed down from this. Lets see how it turns out.

Edit> although the above quoted article seems to claim that Bush backed down, I just read elsewhere that Bush's original langugae was passed. I'll have to do some more research. :?

Borat: "Throw the Jews down the well"

Andrew Sullivan's You Tube of the Day.

Hilarious, in a very disturbing kind of way.
(No, Jess, this is not Chinese toungue twisters and ball whackers)

Irony is...

From Pakistan:

Interesting bit at the end:

“Jihad is a tool for defence and we expect the pope to speak against aggression,” he said.
"The pope’s statement is highly irresponsible,” senior scholar Javed Ahmed Ghamdi said.
“The concept of jihad is not to spread Islam with sword,” Mr Ghamdi said in a statement.
“The pope’s statement was an attempt to jeopardise a remarkable unity displayed by Christians and Muslims against recent Israeli aggression in Lebanon,” a spokesman for the Jamaat-i-Islami said.
SRINAGAR: Meanwhile, police in occupied Kashmir on Thursday seized newspapers carrying Pope Benedict’s statement.

I think we have a new frontrunner for ironic juxtaposition of the year

Pandering Pontif

Some Bullshit from the Coptic Pope:

In the first reaction from a top Christian leader, the head of Egypt's Coptic Orthodox Church said in remarks published Saturday that Pope Benedict XVI's comments on Islam were "against the teachings of Christ."
Coptic Pope Shenouda III told the pro-government Al-Ahram newspaper that he didn't hear the pope's exact words, but that "any remarks which offend Islam and Muslims are against the teachings of Christ."

Right, don't say anything that might piss off the Pharisees.
Also, did you notice how the paper took the actual words and summarized them incorrectly?
The Copt didn't say anything about Ratzinger, he was speaking hypothetically, admittedly, a cowards way out, but, in his position surrounded by 55 million muslims just waiting for an excuse to torch a church, I can't really blame him.

The Papal Furor

Here's a translated transcription of the Pope's speech. To be honest, I'm not sure i understood it in all its nuance (my mind strarted to wander near the end) but the section relevent to Islam is clear. He is making a critique, but I think one that may be justifiable (I don't know enough about Islam to say for sure).
It is clear that there are many places in the world where Islamic practices are forced upon people. Whether or not that is from the religion or the people who practice it, I don't know.

As for Il Papa, this is the first thing I've ever heard about him. Up until now I was instictually distrustful (I think it was because of those beady little rat eyes). Based on this speech, however, I have to say good job to the Cardinal College. He'll get my vote when he comes up for reelection. How long is his term again?

1984 watch

From ABC News

Hussein is one of an estimated 14,000 people detained by the U.S. military worldwide 13,000 of them in Iraq. They are held in limbo where few are ever charged with a specific crime or given a chance before any court or tribunal to argue for their freedom.

Well, they must all be terrorists, right?

Quick, lets waterboard them; let's set the dogs on them.

Time Passes

You know how, in certain biopics, or romance movies, they'll have a big plot crisis in the young part of their life, then once it seems to resolve it self they need some sort of device to get them to the end, or some later period so the plot can move forward once again. A good example of this is Mr. Holland's Opus.

Often times there will be a very cool song that plays, and you see a few short scenes, with the characters getting a little older (and grayer and pudgier) and then the music stops to start the new crisis.

If there were a subtitle for these scenes it would be "Time passes".

Well, that's what's going on for me. I go to work, I have my classes, I ride the bus home, play in the garden with Makaylah and Jessica go upstairs, cook dinner run the girl a bath, read the paper and go to sleep. On the weekends I we wake up a little bit later, have a nice brunch with a few friends, get some shopping in and spend more time in the garden.

My ideal montage would be me pulling Makaylah around the garden, but, as the scen progresses, she gets bigger and bigger, maybe graduates to a tricycle, then a bicycle, then I can give her driving lessons and then she flies off to America for her freshman year of college.

Too Much Love

I picked up the girl from nursery last week and, as I was riding the metro home, I noticed a a raised ring about the size of a quater on her right arm, down near the wrist.

My first thought was that it might be ring worm. I had it once in Airborne school and it looked just like that. Upon closer examination, though, it looked a little bit more like baby teeth marks. So, despite spending the weekend having horrible dreams about ringworm spreading all over my child's body (and then spreading to me) I waited for a few days. Sure enough, the marks faded to a bruise. Case closed.

So, on Sunday, when I picked her up, I asked the teacher, "did she get bitten?"

The teacher responded "yes, she did get bit today."

I, thinking there must be a language problem, said, "No, she was bitten on Thursday."

But the teacher insisted that it was today, telling me she had applied antibiotic ointment and everything. Sure enough, the little bite marks were back on her arm.

I asked the teacher what was going on and why was some child biting my daughter. Her response?

"The other children love her so much; they just want to eat her up."

I don't know how to respond to that. Any suggestions?